Being a teenager is the bridge that connects our lives as kids and the transition to adulthood.
The birth of a child in any household is met with joy, laughter and the start of a new beginning. Family members gather to celebrate this new human and send congratulatory messages to the parents on this new feat.
This celebration is much more pronounced if that is the first child born into that household. After a few years, this child is enrolled into kindergarten to start their educational journey. Then, they proceed to enter grade school or primary school and move on to high school.
Towards the end of grade school, most kids are already teenagers which is the group of years that have “teen” as a suffix.
During these years, you notice different behavioural patterns in your child. Your child who loved joining the family for outings can’t wait to go back to the comfort of their bedroom.
These patterns don’t end there. Your child openly disagrees with suggestions you make and the way you do certain things. This child just wants to do things “his/her way” without depending on you.
Seeing these changes makes you concerned and you ponder what you are doing wrong to preempt these behaviours. You are starting to overthink things, looking for ways to change or get your teenager to behave better.
No worries, in this article, we will be sharing six proven ways you can cope with a teenager, both at home and in a public setting:
Steps to Take
1. Engage in Active Listening
Engaging in active listening is different from merely being physically present during a conversation.
It is getting rid of distractions and being immersed in the conversation, it requires you to drop any bias you have through upbringing or experience and listen with empathy.
Also, engaging in active listening ensures that you know when to respond and ask questions to fully understand the issue. It requires you to listen to the teenager like you would a full-grown adult.
2. Acknowledge Generational Differences
Each generation is different. Each generation has its perks. For example, the millennials were the last generation to have a feel of a world without technology before transitioning to the technological phase.
Gen Z’s have a certain way of communicating which makes them unique. Your teenager belongs to Gen Z or Gen Alpha based on the individual’s age.
Recognising these differences during conversations is a must instead of forcing them to reason or communicate like the older generation.
3. Set Boundaries
As a parent or caregiver, you have to set boundaries for your teenager. Just like you did when they were kids.
Boundaries like a specific time for going to bed, doing their homework or chores but with teenagers, there is a twist. Rather than imposing boundaries on them, it is better to engage in a conversation before setting those boundaries.
These rules should be discussed, negotiated, and agreed upon by you and your teenager to achieve progress here.
4. Allow the Teenager to Learn
Allow your teenagers to learn, allow them to make decisions and take charge of their life in certain areas believing that you have equipped them for this.
Give them the liberty to find and discover new hobbies by themselves. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking they will want to study the same course as you in college, play the same sport or love the same extra-curricular activities.
Furthermore, allow them to make decisions on their own without constant interference. Though, you can inquire or have a discussion with them and share your thoughts regarding a situation.
5. Keep your Cool
Don’t be tempted to fly off the handle when there is emotional tension between you and your child.
Though some teenagers’ behaviours could be frustrating, it is important to encourage decorum and engage in meaningful conversations to get to the heart of the matter.
6. Refuse to Succumb to Negative Conduct
No matter how accommodating you are to see things from the point of view of a teenager, don’t succumb to any negative conduct.
Be informed in dishing out sanctions for unruly behaviour. Know when to draw the line between differences in opinions and outright disrespect.
Conclusion
As far as you are a parent, caregiver, family member or neighbour, you will be in the same vicinity with a teenager at different points in your life even if they are not your biological children.
Being open to engaging in active listening, allowing them to learn and setting boundaries are ways you can build meaningful relationships and help them navigate this important stage of their life.
Read this: How To Help Teenagers Overcome Procrastination.
