A bully is someone who intimidates, harms or coerces others whom he or she perceives as vulnerable and weak, intentionally and repeatedly.
There are various forms of bullying, which include physical bullying, verbal bullying, social bullying, and cyberbullying.
A bully will often target the weak and use their power against them, which is often either physical strength, popularity, or embarrassing information, to control or harm their victims. A high percentage of children have been bullied at least once by fellow children, either in school, church, at home, or online.
Research shows that no child is born a bully; they eventually grow into one for various reasons, often influenced by a combination of personal, social, and environmental factors.
Some Common Reasons Children Bully
1. Seeking power and control: Some children enjoy a sense of dominance, and bullying other children they perceive as weak makes them feel powerful and in control.
2. Imitating behaviour: Most children learn the act of bullying by imitating what they observe in their family, media, or peers. When they see bullying as a way to get attention or respect from others, they tend to adopt similar tactics.
3. Attention-seeking: Some children use the act of bullying as a way to get attention from their peers, teachers, or parents, even though it’s negative attention.
4. Low self-esteem: Having low self-esteem is one reason most children bully, by making others feel worse and hurting their feelings they feel better about themselves.
5 Peer pressure: Being accepted by peers can be a powerful motivation for bullying, Most children bully to fit in with their peers and avoid being bullied themselves.
6. Family Issues: A child from a dysfunctional family is likely to be a bully. When aggression and a lack of supervision are normalised in a child’s life, it can result in the child acting out.
7. Lack of Empathy: Some children lack emotional intelligence and can not understand or relate to the feelings of others, making it easy for them to harm others without feeling remorseful.
Getting a child to stop bullying can seem impossible, but a combination of communication, understanding, and proactive strategies has proven effective.
Steps You Can Take to Get Your Child to Stop Bullying
1. Understand the behaviour: Understanding the root cause of the child’s bullying behaviour is a crucial step. A child’s bullying could be due to stress, imitating others, struggling with their emotions, or seeking attention.
2. Open communication: Communicate with your child without being accusatory or angry. Talk about their behaviour, ask why they are acting that way, and listen to them without interrupting.
3. Teach empathy: Teach your children how to be empathetic and how their actions may affect others. Ask questions like “How would you feel if treated the same way?”. Empathy plays a big role in whether a child will become a bully or not.
4. Set clear boundaries: Enforcing clear rules about acceptable behaviour and making sure your child understands the consequences of bullying can be an effective strategy to stop a child from bullying.
5. Model positive behaviour: Children often watch and mimic the behaviour adults display. Demonstrating the art of kindness, empathy, and respect in your interactions with others will show your children how to behave and how to treat others.
6. Monitor and supervise: Monitor and supervise your children’s interactions with others, either in person or online, and immediately address any signs of bullying.
7. Reinforce positive behaviours: Praising and rewarding your children when they show kindness and empathy to others will teach them that it’s right and good to be kind and empathetic towards others.
8. Seek professional help: It is advisable to seek professional help from a psychologist or counsellor if the behaviour persists. A psychologist or counsellor can provide support and strategies for you and your child.
9. Work with the school: By collaborating with the school, you can ensure a consistent approach to addressing bullying on the school premises. The school can help by providing additional resources and support to stop the act of bullying.
Conclusion
Addressing the act of bullying will require understanding the underlying reasons and providing appropriate support and solutions to effectively stop the act of bullying.
Children bully for various reasons, including family issues, peer pressure, low self-esteem, etc and understanding these reasons can help immensely in stopping bullying.
Read also: Family Factor And How It Shapes A Child’s Behaviour
