When we talk about anything relationship, what suddenly pops up in our minds is LOVE.
Relationship does not only talk about love towards opposite gender or same genders. It includes the total collection of relations like our parents, in-laws, relations, children, cousins, grand parents, sibling, the society at large and so many more.
Being in a relationship is a very unforgettable and beautiful experience,but with time it may begin to have ups and downs ,especially if there is a past history of an ex or exes with either the female gender, male gender.
If you are a very cautious and noticeable person, it will come to your knowledge that so many do confront various types of all love-all which can be handled rightly if we have the mind and effrontery in addition with strong determination to do so.
So many female genders in relationship consider the need to play emotions, show love and exhibit love as being out of the way abnormal. I completely don’t align and accept that kind of subconscious assumption.. I see it as part of a responsible, matured and normal human need and this hold to be an essential elements of any relationship.
In fact, studies shows that a more genuinely lovable family or even couple will have a more stable relationship. I stand confidently to say that there is no fool proof method of building a successful relationship. But I will be stating the elements that strengthens and upholds a happy and healthy relationship and will also help those about to mount the train of a relationship life to avoid toxic relationship.
The first one I will be speaking about is RESPECT. Respect is the key factor to a strong and healthy relationship. Respect is not attributed to one of the partners. Both partners must have respect for each other. You mind your words and respect one another’s feelings. Whatever you say make sure it is not meant to hurt the next partner. Whenever he wants to speak, respect his words and if you are not comfortable with the contribution he make, you respectfully lay down your idea and views on the table and then you sort out your differences amicably.
The next one I will be emphasizing on is the TRUST. A relationship without trust is bitter and will be filled with toxicity. You must learn to trust your partner’s words no matter his past history. Although past relationship will helps us know the strength attached to a relationship but still it is not a strong determinant for you to hold on to, that you make up your mind never to trust your man. It’s totally uncalled for and absurd.
If you looking for a perfect man, am so sorry to say, you will age and end up marrying yourself. Man changes even in marriage. You learn different characters and trait of your man even in your marriage. Don’t be fooled by people saying they want to date their man for centuries just to study him before marriage. You can’t know all the characters of a man. It’s never possible. So let’s please learn to trust our partner, no matter how hard it might be.
It should be to the length that you will not believe any word from the third party except you witness the event or your partners comes and open up to you. That’s trust in action, a third party can’t stand as a limitation to the healthiness and strength of your pampered relationship life. Let this word sink down.
Focusing on the issue rather than blame can allow for more effective problem solving and a team based approach. Just figure out the recurring issues in your relationship, then do something about it. I say this because the next key points that strengthens a weak relationship and makes a stronger relationship is what I call, WORK IT OUT.
There is power in team work, there is nothing like “let me mind my business, he is a man, he will certainly sort it out or “this is a lady’s affair, she will definitely sort it out”. There are matter arising in relationship that both partners can sort out on their own. But most times matters get escalated and worse because of lack of team work. Sit down with your partner, speak to him calmly, give him reason why that issue will be sorted out. You can as well lay down possible solutions, merge your ideas and points together and work towards a lasting solution. That’s the power of team work. You will discover that your love will begin to grow stronger and stronger by the way.
Permit me to empathize on this before we move further. Before commenting on any issue you have, repeat the words, I call it “majoring on self examination”, whenever you are having an important discussion with your partner, repeat everything he said in your conscious mind, before commenting on them. I say this because some issues are so annoying, that you might decide not to give a single quota to that discussion.
Be candid with your feeling (good or bad), once you begin to feel and sense that your feelings no longer matter, won’t be heard by any human on earth, or are not worth sharing you are the one at fault because you begin to harbour hatred, pain, negativity as well as resentment. I tell my friends all the time that people need to feel appreciated in any relationship, because I believe everyone has a unique status and gift that he or she needs to pass on to the other partner whether it be little, it still need to be appreciated.
Relationship advice is tricky, when it’s unsolicited ,it might end in pain, shame and everlasting regret. That’s why i also advise that you have a matured, responsible and an understanding friend so that you can as well run to them in times when things are looking dark. You speak to them,. Let them advise you. Deep intimacy, gesture of love and total kindness and good communication skill must not be left out. Let’s build our relationship and take it to a greater height.